"I'm 6'6" and proportional"

--Peter Steele

By Margravine (Ranger) on Unrecorded Date:

She's well acquainted with the velvet touch - like a lizard on a window pane.

John Lennon (after the drug experimentation began)

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

"Death has no prejudices or concerns, it merely takes those it chooses and it chooses everyone eventually."

--Damien Ertle

By Margravine (Ranger) on Unrecorded Date:

All the world's a play. Act well your part and try not to fall off the stage

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Unrecorded Date:

They say money can't buy happiness, but I don't remember ever being this miserable when I had it...

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

"Naughty."

--Sol

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

"Seems to me I ordered sweet and sour pork,
But Garfields on my fork, He's purring here on my fork."

---Wierd Al, Cats in the Kettle

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

?

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

-2: Sung to the tune of "Cats in the Cradle"

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Unrecorded Date:

ummmmmmm... Where, exactly, did you hear this? I am as big a fan of Weird Al as they come, and I have never ever heard that before. Do state your source? Please? ;>

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

Acctually I'm not too sure about the fact that Wierd Al sang it but it was listed as such on Napster(which is probably why it is wrong.)

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

Napster calls ANY song that's funny a "Weird Al" song. It's because he's the only well-known comedy singer of our time. Like I came across "A*shole Son" which was hilarious, and "Chewbacca: What a Wookie" also funny, but neither was a Weird Al.

Sol

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Unrecorded Date:

okeydokey. Just making sure I hadn't gone any more crazy than I already was. L8R.

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

He you guys heard that song "I'm the only gay eskimo in my tribe" by Corky and the Juice Pigs? It's hilarious.

"I go ice fishing with my good friend Harka,
but all I wanna do is to get into his parka,"

By Margravine (Ranger) on Unrecorded Date:

My friend burned me a Rockapella CD and stuck 'Gay Eskimo' on as an epilogue - surprised the heck out of me when it came on.

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

Wasn't it funny? Can I get a copy of that song sometime? Since I've got slow-and-pokey dial-up it doesn't make a visit to Napster practical.

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

I just downloaded it and it was f'n hilariouse.

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

If you thought that was funny you should try listneing to the Bare Naked Ladies early albums before they got popular. I've been listening to them since their first album Gorden and they are great.

By Margravine (Ranger) on Unrecorded Date:

And now, to get back on topic:

"All you need to start an asylum is an empty room and the right sort of people."

--My Man Godfrey

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

So you say there is no God
Just a clever man's charade
A once upon a
Fairy tales fraud
Has God made man or
Man made God

---Exteme, There is no God

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

I'm the only gay Eskimo
I'm the only one I know
I'm the only gay Eskimo
In my tribe

I go out seal hunting with my best friend Tarka
But all want to do is get into his parka

I'm the only gay Eskimo
In my tribe

Well me and Muk-Fluk-Chuk-Buk
We both like blubber
But me I've got this crazy fetish for rubber

I'm the only gay Eskimo
In my tribe

I make a wish on the Northern Lights
That I can find a decent pair of whaleskin tights

I'm the only gay Eskimo
In my tribe

And the seals they sing now...

These cold winter nights
Are taking their toll
I even get excited when I see the North Pole
See the North Pole...

I'm the only gay Eskimo
Only gay Eskimo
I'm the only one I know
The only one I know-oh-oh-oh
I'm the only gay Eskimo
In my tribe.


Corky and the Juice Pigs

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

I have had a perfectly wonderful evening, but this wasn't it.

---Groucho Marx

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

If all the world's a stage, I want to operate the trap door.

---Paul Beatty

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

There are two kinds of egotists; Those who admit it, and the rest of us.

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

Living your life is so difficult, it has never been attempted before.

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

The best cure for insomnia is to get a lot of sleep.

---W.C. Fields

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

Children act like their parents despite every effort to teach them good manners.

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

Three may keep a secret, if two of them are dead.

---Ben Franklin

By Margravine (Ranger) on Unrecorded Date:

The best runners are those that never have to pop the thong off the holster in the whole run. Just get the goods, ghost, and deliver. All those mouthin off about getting into the firefight with the Knights Errant or the like and survived somehow should be asked "Ok chummer, but why you shooting them in the first place?" They got discovered, that's how. This is a biz of silence and secrecy, not shooting and blood. Go to war for that.
-Quickmetals , Elven Sammy

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_hawk) on Unrecorded Date:

I can't imagine to be like you
The pain and the sufferin'
You put me through.

---"B*tch", Sevendust

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

"People in Power are usually people who are attracted to Power."

[unknown]

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

"There's a party in my pants and everyone is invited!"

-???

By Bryan Cummings (Houdini) on Unrecorded Date:

"Fish and guests stink after three days."

-Benjamin Franklin

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Unrecorded Date:

Actually, Nat, the actual quote is "There's a party in my pants and everybody's coming"

You can also substitute 'pants' with 'mouth' with equal effect...

But this is too naughty to post here on LEV, so... ;>

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

Okay, if you say so. I just heard that in passing, so I have no idea where the original quote came from.

I *am* too naughty for Lev, but I'm here anyway =)

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

RE: PANTS

The quote I THOUGHT came from Ace Ventura... true or no?

Sol

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

I heard it long before Ace Ventura =)

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

Hmmmm, the Mask?

Sol

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Unrecorded Date:

Back in high school I saw a girl wearing a T-shirt that had that printed on it... Only it was the mouth one. Everybody really liked her, though I never figured out why... ;>

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

I wanna get a t-shirt that says "COCKMASTER" on the front. I'd wear it all the time =) Can you figure out why?

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Unrecorded Date:

So every guy would like you? ;>

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

hahahahaa!

Fred, you're a trip!

Nat, I think you should get it. Then I'll get an "everyone thinks I'm a lesbian" shirt. The padded version.

Sol

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

I think they sell that on Chirstopher street.

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

Nat, you have to get me one. That'd be svenn.

Sol

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

If I can find one, it will be yours =)

If not, we can make one for you. What cup size would you like? A, B, C, D or DD?

By Bryan Cummings (Houdini) on Unrecorded Date:

"We are dreamers, shapers, singers, and makers. We
study the mysteries of laser and circuit, crystal and
scanner, holographic demons and invocations of
equations. These are the tools we employ, and we know
many things. Fourteen words to make someone fall in
love with you forever, seven words to make
them go without pain, how to say goodbye to a friend
who is dying, how to be poor, how to be rich, how to
rediscover dreams when the world has stolen them from
you."
Elric the Technomage (Babylon 5)

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

Bry, sweet! I want to be a Technomancer!

Nat, sweet! If you find one, I'll owe ya some $$. You should come to Rachacha. We -do- have a D&D game to finish :P

Sol

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

Yeah, or we could finish the D&D thingy here! Maybe make a topic for it? Drunken Master Wufei needs to come out and play.

By Bryan Cummings (Houdini) on Unrecorded Date:

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic."--Arthur C. Clarke

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Unrecorded Date:

Wu-fei! hwaah!

I would consider it, Nat, if all players agreed! It could take a long time to finish, tho, online and all...

Sol

By Margravine (Ranger) on Unrecorded Date:

"The trick to conversations inside your head is that they STAY inside your head."

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Unrecorded Date:

"You're just jealous because the voices in YOUR head are talking to ME."

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Unrecorded Date:

Fred, naughty! Keep your thoughts to yourself, I'm tired of your broadcasting =)

By Margravine (Ranger) on Unrecorded Date:

"My brain hurts"
--The Gumbies

By Bryan Cummings (Houdini) on Thursday, May 31, 2001 - 05:22 pm:

"Any movie with a monkey in it is automaticaly cool."

A quote from the book of Sol

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Friday, June 01, 2001 - 12:40 am:

The voices in my head
these are
the voices in my head

---Dennis Leary, the voices in my head

By Technomage (Houdini) on Friday, June 01, 2001 - 02:42 pm:

ARTHUR: Yes, of course! The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch! 'Tis one of the sacred relics Brother Maynard carries with him! Brother Maynard! Bring up the Holy Hand Grenade!
MONKS: [chanting] Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem. Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem. Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem. Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem.
ARTHUR: How does it, um-- how does it work?
LAUNCELOT: I know not, my liege.
ARTHUR: Consult the Book of Armaments!
BROTHER MAYNARD: Armaments, Chapter Two, verses Nine to Twenty-one.
SECOND BROTHER: And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying,'O Lord, bless this thy hand grenade that with it thou mayest blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.'
And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large chu--
MAYNARD: Skip a bit, Brother.
SECOND BROTHER: And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the
number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third
number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.'
MAYNARD: Amen.

By Technomage (Houdini) on Friday, June 08, 2001 - 11:03 am:

"Do not meddle in the affairs of system admins for they subtle and quick to anger."

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Friday, June 08, 2001 - 03:22 pm:

kinda like "Do not meddle in the affairs of Dragons, for you are crunchy and taste good with ketchup"

By Technomage (Houdini) on Tuesday, June 12, 2001 - 01:09 pm:

Yeah, both are derivations of the original J.R. Tolkien quote, as spoken by one of his beloved characters in the Lord of the Rings Trilogy:

"Do not meddle in the affairs of wizards, for they subtle and quick to anger."

By Funk Sol Brother (Sol) on Tuesday, June 12, 2001 - 08:33 pm:

Jeff has the Simarillion Audio Book - on his computer. He got it from Napster! Woof!

Sol

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Monday, July 02, 2001 - 08:15 pm:

Pain has a face.

Let me show it to you.

I... AM... PAIN!

---Pinhead, Hellraiser Bloodlines

By Subcriminal (Nat) on Thursday, July 12, 2001 - 07:22 pm:

"Boys are cute, every woman should own one."

- Spiffy t-shirt I saw a righteous chick wearking in the village today =)

By Technomage (Houdini) on Monday, August 13, 2001 - 02:14 pm:

"You can't be a real country unless you have a beer and an airline. It helps if you
have some kind of a football team, or some nuclear weapons, but at the very least
you need a beer."

--Frank Zappa

By Technomage (Houdini) on Tuesday, August 21, 2001 - 04:42 pm:

"Programmers are tools for converting caffeine into code."
--Anonymous

By Margravine (Ranger) on Sunday, September 02, 2001 - 02:17 pm:

"The most merciful thing in the world, I think, is the inability of the human mind to correlate all its contents." -- H P Lovecraft

By Yo' Daddy (Sol) on Monday, October 15, 2001 - 04:56 pm:

From Netscape News

"We have no hard data on that yet, but it's clear that Mr. bin Laden is a man who is an evil man," Bush said.

By Yo' Daddy (Sol) on Tuesday, October 16, 2001 - 02:02 pm:

"When we started the XP project, which was coded-named Whistler, we had a vision," Gates said. "The vision was to take the experiences that people have today and make them better."

- Bill Gates

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Wednesday, October 17, 2001 - 08:56 am:

"Windows XP ROCKS." ----Me, 2 weeks ago, upon getting my BRAND NEW MACHINE up and running

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Friday, October 19, 2001 - 11:08 am:

"Windows XP? When will the evil, corupt, vile monster that is Microsoft stop?" Me, when I heard a new windows OS was coming out.

By Technomage (Houdini) on Thursday, December 20, 2001 - 03:09 pm:

"Sticks and stones may break your bones, but meteors will flatten you to a pulp." - Ridgetop shaman

By Yo' Daddy (Sol) on Thursday, December 20, 2001 - 04:56 pm:

Ha ha ha, you ARE hankerin' for a game of Magic, aren't you Bryan? Now that new Odyssey has some nice cards, doesn't it?

Darren's already sprung some Flashbacks on me.

Sol

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Wednesday, February 13, 2002 - 12:24 am:

"So are ready to brave the humiliation our parents call social interaction?"

--Bill to Jason on going to school, Knightmare, Damien Ertle

By Technomage (Houdini) on Monday, April 01, 2002 - 10:28 am:

"It's much easier to develop software using actual technology, instead of just made up stuff."

By Technomage (Houdini) on Monday, April 01, 2002 - 10:42 am:

"Looks like someone has got a case of the Mondays."

-Quote from the movie Office Space

By Starlit simulacron (Ranger) on Friday, May 31, 2002 - 10:29 am:

Ewan McGregor's early career was dedicated almost exclusively to indie, low-budget, and non-feature films. When cast as Obi-wan Kenobi in Star Wars, Episode I: The Phantom Menace, an interviewer reminded him of his "aversion" to major films, and he replied "I know what I said, but, hey! This is Star Wars!"

"I've been waiting nearly twenty years to have my own light saber. Nothing's cooler than being a Jedi Knight."

By Yo' Daddy (Sol) on Tuesday, June 04, 2002 - 10:00 am:

i saw a rabbit, a brown one

Jakov

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Tuesday, July 09, 2002 - 10:34 am:

"Where's me Drink?"

"How do you expect me to shoot straight without me drink?"

"Ah, there's me drink- Get in my belly!"


-Dwarven Rifleman,Warcraft III

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Wednesday, November 06, 2002 - 11:08 am:

"We regret confusion which are brought by the effort of our publications and because of traffic and cleaning problem. But how there are we who spread glance! Present profit do the Punkin Chunker! And candy! Wow of Yum Yum!"

----Tada-O corporation spokesman in response to allegations that the new "Pumpkin Chunker" is dangerous and their halloween marketing ploy was badly planned (this is from the online game 'Earth & Beyond').

By Technomage (Houdini) on Tuesday, March 25, 2003 - 11:35 am:

"I believe in equality. Equality for everybody. No matter how stupid they are or how superior I am to them."

Steve Martin

--

"The only way to keep your health is to eat what you don't want, drink what you don't like, and do what you'd rather not."

Mark Twain

--

"640K ought to be enough for anybody."

Bill Gates , 1981

--

"What's the use of sending a 2 million missile into a 10 dollar tent to hit a camel in the butt."

George W. Bush

By Starlit simulacron (Ranger) on Friday, May 02, 2003 - 12:22 pm:

"The universe is run by the complex interweaving of three elements: energy, matter, and enlightened self-interest."

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Sunday, July 13, 2003 - 08:34 pm:

Ladies and Gentlemen,
Boys and Girls.

Dyin' times here!

Down with the sickness(live)/ Disturbed

By I, (Ranger) on Wednesday, September 10, 2003 - 02:48 pm:

So which is worse by your lights, abandoning blood kin or killing them if they chose the wrong path?

--R.P.

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Monday, September 22, 2003 - 01:34 pm:

You're too young to expierience that much pain.

--Ivanava, B 5

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Tuesday, September 23, 2003 - 01:40 pm:

"Fred's right xp does rock, I regret my comments to the contrary."

-me 2 days ago when I got my computer running again.

By I, (Ranger) on Wednesday, November 05, 2003 - 04:13 pm:

"Zathras used to being beast of burden to other people's needs. Very sad life. Probably have very sad death. But at least there is symmetry."

By I, (Ranger) on Wednesday, November 05, 2003 - 04:14 pm:

"Touch passion when it comes to you. It's rare enough as it is. Don't walk away from it when it calls you by name."
- Marcus Cole

By I, (Ranger) on Wednesday, November 05, 2003 - 04:15 pm:

"Nothing is sexier than a girl with a death machine."
-General Morgan

By I, (Ranger) on Wednesday, November 05, 2003 - 04:19 pm:

"This is the kind of conversation that can only end in a gunshot."

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Tuesday, March 30, 2004 - 01:32 pm:

"What the hell's the matter with you people?"

---John Chrichton, Farscape

By I, (Ranger) on Friday, April 02, 2004 - 04:41 pm:

I've found most of life's problems can be eliminated by getting rid of the evidence.

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Tuesday, April 06, 2004 - 01:59 pm:

I tought I taw a puddy tat.
I did! I did taw a puddy tat!

By Merlin (Merlin) on Tuesday, May 11, 2004 - 12:01 am:

"Every time they wanted me to play a part, I wasn't wearing any underwear."

-Some girl at a party last week

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Thursday, May 13, 2004 - 01:11 pm:

"I say, did you hear me? I said move and I meant it! I was sitting on that rock enjoying the rising sun on my old bones when you had the nerve to cast a shadow over it and chill me! Move this instant, I say!"

--Fizban to an Oak tree, DragonLance chronicles vol. 1

By I, (Ranger) on Friday, May 14, 2004 - 03:31 pm:

No boom today. Boom tomorrow. Always boom tomorrow.

--Susan Ivanova

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Tuesday, May 25, 2004 - 03:00 pm:

Do you want a peice of yourself?...Lets step outside I'll kick my @ss!

--Robin Williams on alcahole, Robin Williams live on Broadway

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Wednesday, May 26, 2004 - 01:49 pm:

Now kids just remember the dangerouse side effects of alcahole. Never look into a hole full of alcas they don't like that.

--me after seeing my spelling error.

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Friday, May 28, 2004 - 08:39 am:

"This? This is ice. This is what happens when water gets too cold. This? This is Kent. This is what happens when a person gets too sexually frustrated."

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Friday, May 28, 2004 - 02:29 pm:

Zim: WHY WAS THERE BACON IN THE SOAP?

Gir: I MADE IT MYSELF!

--Invader Zim, Rise of Zit Boy

By Vengence is Mine (Knight_Hawk) on Wednesday, June 02, 2004 - 04:29 pm:

"Wesley why won't you hold me?"

"Gently"

"Thats all you can say at a time like this gently?"

"Gently" whack "umph"

---Wesley and Buttercup, The Princess Bride

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Friday, June 18, 2004 - 10:25 am:

"I never in my life Splattered."

---Fizban, dragons of winter night

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Sunday, June 20, 2004 - 11:08 pm:

"Pwent, it is said in Mithral Hall, could start a fight with a rock, and grievously injure himself and those around him before actually winning."

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Monday, June 21, 2004 - 02:39 pm:

"Hello my name is Melvin George the second, I was born in Boston I live in New York City and I am not cool."

---Melvin George II, this great comic me GF Jon and George saw on Sat. night as part of GF's Bachelor Party.

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Wednesday, July 21, 2004 - 01:21 pm:

"I am the wicker Wookiee!"

--Grrumosssh, SWG on putting his new Kasshyykk Cerimonial armor on for the first time.

Yes it does in fact look that way. Ask GF I think he laughs at me everytime he sees me in it.

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Thursday, July 22, 2004 - 03:48 pm:

Ceremonial, NOT cerimonial. And yes, it is funny.

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Tuesday, August 03, 2004 - 02:25 pm:

"There are only 2 things in this world that I despise: people who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and the DUTCH!"

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Monday, November 15, 2004 - 10:04 am:

ZIM: "Ok self destruct GIR."
GIR: "Finally! squeel" BOOM

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Monday, November 15, 2004 - 03:49 pm:

"Oh well I guess this is just a footnote in the comedy of my life."

Me, SWG forums regarding my car accident.

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Tuesday, November 16, 2004 - 11:06 am:

wow, dude, listen to "Mr. Depressed" over here...

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Tuesday, November 16, 2004 - 11:32 am:

Acctually it was taken as quiet positive by my fellow forum trolls, and that was how it was intended. Now perhaps your reading of depression in the statement is another matter entirely? Would you like to lie down on the couch and tell us what is bothering you of late? I'll just be a minute while I get a pen and papper for notes.

By The One Known Only as (Greyfox) on Wednesday, November 17, 2004 - 05:06 pm:

well, sorry. I'd like to tell you what's been bothering me lately, but the subject matter is inappropriate for this board. Although you probably already know what it is (and don't say it out loud) from previous occasions that we've hung out recently. but that's ok, everybody's HAPPY, right?

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Thursday, November 18, 2004 - 08:56 am:

Yes happy and mad.

"I'm mad your mad, we're all mad here."

Chesire Cat, Alice in Wonderland

By Technomage (Houdini) on Thursday, November 18, 2004 - 11:51 am:

Happy happy joy joy!

Happy happy joy joy joy!

By Who is the (Knight_Hawk) on Monday, November 29, 2004 - 04:16 pm:

When all your beliefs are stripped away, can you hang on to your sanity?

--promo for Farscape Peacekeeper Wars

By Aileen Pagan-Welch (Ewokie) on Thursday, April 14, 2005 - 08:47 am:

Reason to smile:

Every 7 minutes of every day, someone in an aerobics class pulls a hamstring.