Pierogies:

1) Go to supermarket.
2) Go to frozen food section
3) Grab box of Mrs. T's Pierogies, any potato with cheese variety is recommended. NO funny stuff like "cheese and jalapino" or just cheese flavor. Pierogies are NOT meant to be spicy or flavorful. If they are not somewhat BLAND they are not PIEROGIES!

Run home.

DO NOT NUKE THE PIEROGIES FOR THE LOVE OF ALL THAT IS SACRED. Boil them! Damn you!

Quick way:
1) Boil for 5 minutes and drain, toss in butter with a little salt. Eat.

Traditional, artery-clogging way:
1) Boil Pierogies for 5 minutes & drain.
2) Take a medium onion and chop finely.
3) Dice a few strips of bacon (more if you are making a ton of pierogies for more than 1 person)
4) In a sautee pan fry the bacon and the onion until past golden, and semi-carmelized. Add a few pats of butter. Bacon pieces should be a little crispy on the outside but not petrified.
5) Toss boiled pierogies into onion/bacon mixture. Eat with a generous glob of sour cream on the side.

I just tried Mrs. T's pierogies today and was totally shocked. They are very good, and as close to the real deal as you can ever hope to buy. As someone who has made countless pierogies in her lifetime with grandma, I can offer this advice: don't try making your own. It's too much damn trouble and the Mrs. T's are reasonably cheap and good. Buy them instead of torturing yourself.

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Wednesday, January 28, 2004 - 02:20 am:

Nat's artery-clogging, slavic mushroom sauce

Shrooms are one of the few ingredients in slavic cooking that actually has flavor, which is probably why slavs love mushrooms so much. Eat enough potatoes day after day and you will know what I mean.

This mushroom sauce is easy. I am guessing at the measurements below since this is my own little recipie modified from my grandma's- try it once and adjust what you feel appropriate. By the way this sauce goes great on pierogies. But do not substitute the butter for margarine or oil, or the half&half for milk. You need the fat for this or it just doesn't work. If you are on Atkins, this is a great recipie to modify to make beef stroganof. Just add a dolip of sour cream when you add the half&half and cook the onions in the beef pan drippings instead of butter. If anything you can leave out the sage. The mushrooms are more than flavorfull on their own, but sage compliments mushrooms very nicely.

1) Dice 1 small onion finely
2) dice 2 shallots (optional, adds nice flavor but hard to find in stores sometimes)
3) Slice (thin) 1/2 lb of Crimini Mushrooms or "baby Bellas" with stems trimmed (these are actually baby portabellas, however they do taste a little different than mature portabellas in cooking. You may use portabella shrooms as a sub if you can't find the babies, just cut them into smaller pieces before you slice them).
4) 2 cups of half & half
5) a few pats of butter
6) Salt & pepper to taste
7) Finely chopped fresh sage leaves (optional)

Sautee the chopped sage in butter for a minute or to infuse the flavor. Sautee the onions and shallots in this sage-butter on medium for a few minutes until they "sweat" and become translucent(don't burn or carmelize). Throw in the mushrooms. Sprinke in a little salt & pepper, and turn the heat up a little bit and stir occasionally. When the mushrooms soften and sweat, add in the half & half.

Bring to a simmer and turn heat down to low. Stir occasionally. The sauce will thicken in 10-20 minutes. When the sauce is almost done, stir constantly. You don't want the bottom to burn when the sauce gets thick.

Put this on anything you want. Best on anything with potatoes or even pasta.

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Wednesday, January 28, 2004 - 02:50 am:

4 Minute Hollendaise- no kidding

The secret is to get a blender to do the mixing for you.

Neccessary Hardare: Blender or food processor
3 egg yolks
1 stick of butter
pinch of cayenne
pinch of salt
1 tsp lemon juice

1) Throw 3 egg yolks, pinch of cayenne pepper, pinch of salt and fresh (not bottled or it will taste like ass) lemon juice into blender or large food processor.
4) Heat stick of butter in saucepan until BOILING hot (don't nuke the butter, by the time it gets hot enough in the microwave it tends to explode all over the place and makes a mess. Just do it on the stove)
5) Cover blender and turn that baby on high. Remove the center cap on the blender cover so you can pour things into the blender without getting backsplash.
6) Drizzle half of the hot, boiling butter into the blender SLOWLY. Let the bleder mix this for a minute or two.
7) Reheat the remaining butter until boiling hot and pour the rest into the blender and mix for another minute.
8) Turn the blender off and taste the sauce. add more salt, cayenne or lemon juice to suit your preferences and blend for a few more seconds.
9) Pour your yummy hollendaise sauce out of the blender and serve on whatever.

Pretty sneaky, eh? No need for a double boiler or making your hand fall off from whisking the sauce like a madman so it doesn't clump! That the pinch of cayenne is great! It adds just a little kick to the sauce to make it perfect. I use this all the time and I feel like julia child without having to slave away. Fast, painless, yummy hollendaise.

By I, (Ranger) on Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 01:05 pm:

The lords of the known universe love Mrs T's. We get the smaller 'rogies version they sell for the smaller mouths on said lords. They like 'em with butter, sour cream does not endear itself to the future universe conquerers.

Since I know you're stove top only Nat - here's another for you:

DRUNKARD'S SOUP

Oil
3 eggs
3 cloves garlic, sliced thin
Parsley
Dry French bread, broken into small chunks
Water

Coat bottom of cast iron fry pan with oil. Add Garlic and brown gently. Add Bread and stir to coat with oil. Add water to cover. Add parsley. Simmer 15-20 minutes. After the soup has simmered, add eggs. The eggs can either be stirred in or poached.

This soup is good for colds and hangovers. You might, however, wish to stand down wind from folks afterwards.

By I, (Ranger) on Saturday, February 07, 2004 - 01:10 pm:

Or how about a reason to buy Ramen:


Chicken and Broccoli Ramen

1 Tbsp. oil
1 lb. boneless, skinless chicken breast halves
2 cups frozen broccoli flowerets
1 4.5-oz. jar sliced mushrooms, drained
1-3/4 cups water
1 Tbsp. soy sauce
2 3-oz. pkg. chicken-flavor ramen noodles

Slice chicken into thin strips. Heat oil in a skillet over medium-high heat. Add chicken. Stir fry until chicken is no longer pink in center.

Add broccoli, mushrooms, water, soy sauce and 1 flavoring packet from ramen noodles stir to mix well and bring to a boil. Break noodles in half and add to chicken and vegetables. Stir and bring to a boil again.

Reduce heat to low. Cover skillet and simmer 7 to 10 minutes or until broccoli is tender and chicken is thoroughly cooked, stirring frequently.

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Monday, February 09, 2004 - 01:57 am:

Wanna know what would add some nice kick to that one? Sautee some garlic and ginger in the oil first, substitute the chicken for pork and throw in a few generous pinches of chinese 5 spice powder. You won't need the flavor packet

By I, (Ranger) on Wednesday, February 11, 2004 - 11:32 am:

Less salty your way too.

Let me know how it comes out

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Wednesday, February 11, 2004 - 03:45 pm:

5 spice powder is one of those secret ingredients you really can't make chinese food without.

I usually use it to make brown sauce with stir-fry. All you really need is garlic, ginger, 5 spice, good soy sauce, and a little chicken or beef stock. Then just throw in some corstarch mixed with a little water at the end to thicken it up. It's great with pork especially. For white sauce use chicken stock and hold the soy and 5 spice.

I don't even use real soup stock because I'm cheap, I just use those small bottles of "concentrated" soup stock. Thrown in a teaspoon of that and a little water and it's good enough for stock in stir-fry.

By I, (Ranger) on Saturday, February 28, 2004 - 10:50 am:

I think I'll stick with canned stock as long as the water at my place turns stuff green.

How about sweets? I made this Roly Poly Pudding over an open fire so I guess you all can make it on your stove tops

6 oz All purpose flour
3 oz shortening
Mix the flour and shortening together in a bowl. Using a round-bladed knife, stir in enough water to give a light, elastic dough. knead very lightly until smooth.
Roll out to about 9 x 11 inches and spread the pastry with 4-6 tablespoons jam. Brush the edges with milk and roll up, starting from the short end.
Make a 2 inch pleat across a clean tea towel or pudding cloth. Or pleat together sheets of greased waxed paper and strong foil. Wrap the rolled pastry loosely, to allow for expansion, in the cloth or foil, pleating the open edges tightly together. Tie the ends securely with string. Make a string handle across the top.
Lower the roll into a large pan of boiling water, cover and boil for 1hours depending on size. Lift out using the string handle.
Place on a wire rack standing over a plate and allow excess moisture to drain off. Snip the string and gently roll the pudding out of the cloth or foil on to a warmed serving plate. Roly-poly puddings can also be baked, uncovered at 400° F about 40 minutes. Slice and serve.
Whipped cream optional. The Brits like custard on theirs.

By I, (Ranger) on Wednesday, March 24, 2004 - 04:23 pm:

Here's one you don't have to cook at all, Nat.

WALDORF SALAD
(CLASSIC)

1 cup tart apples, chopped bite sized
1 tablespoon lemon juice
1 cup celery, chopped small
1/4 cup mayonnaise
1/4 cup walnuts
1/4 cup raisins (optional)
Sprinkle apples with lemon juice after they are cut. Add all other ingredients. Toss to coat all pieces with mayonnaise. Eat.

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Wednesday, March 24, 2004 - 09:15 pm:

Waldorf salad is one of my faves

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Thursday, November 11, 2004 - 12:10 pm:

Nat's beef stroganoff

I dunno if I posed this before, but oh well. This is actually easy. I'm not going to include precise mesurements since I just sorta toss things in. I would recommend this if you have a crappy cut of beef that you bought and you want to make something good out of it. Don't use prime cuts of meat for this, unless you can easily afford it. London broil on sale will work just fine.

Boil water and make some egg noodle pasta- short little wide noodles are good for this sort of thing. You can use other pastas if you like, but try it with these egg noodles at least once.

Take some beef and slice it into thin strips (about a pound or so). Sautee in some butter (yes, butter) on high for a minute on each side. You want them a little raw in the middle at this stage, because you're going to throw them back onto the stove later. Be sure not to overcook them or they will turn rubbery. Remove them from the pan and put 'em on a plate or something. Set it aside for later.

In the same pan you cooked the beef (because you want those pan drippings), toss in some finely diced onion (about half a medium onion) and reduce heat to medium. Add more butter if you need it. You can use shallots instead if you like or a mix of shallot/onion. Don't burn the onions. Cook them for 6-10 minutes until they are nice, translucent and soft.

Throw in some finely sliced baby portobellas (aka "crimini shrooms")- about a cup and a half or MORE of you really want it 'SHROOMY. Regular white shrooms will do but they won't taste as good as the 'bellas. I would stay away from using BIG portobellas, the baby ones seems to have a better flavor and texture for this. Sprinkle in a couple big pinches of salt. Add more butter to the pan if it's too dry. Cook until the shrooms are soft and their moisture has been released a bit.

Throw the beef back into the pan with the onions and shrooms (be sure to throw in any blood or drippings from the beef that may have settled on the bottom of the plate). Add 3-4 tbs of sour cream and stir. The sour cream will liquify under the heat. Bring to a simmer and keep stirring until it thickens up a bit. Season with salt and pepper to taste.

When it's done spoon it over the egg noodles and serve.

By Technomage (Houdini) on Thursday, November 11, 2004 - 03:38 pm:

Sounds yummy!

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Thursday, November 11, 2004 - 04:19 pm:

Yeah it sure is! Don't eat it if you're on a strict diet or have cholesterol issues. This is a dish I make once in a while, maybe once a month or so, it's pretty much a treat when I make it. There really isn't a way to make a light version of this dish. You could substitute the sour cream for half & half- but that won't really cut the calories by any stretch of the imagination. Whole milk is too runny, unless you make a roux to thicken it up- but it still won't taste the same.

Fat is your friend.

By GCM2235 (Norm) on Thursday, November 11, 2004 - 11:30 pm:

For a low carb diet, try using eggs instead of egg noodles. Or small strips of paper. :P

Of course, the only thing I cook is pasta with chili.

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Friday, November 12, 2004 - 07:42 am:

They also make low carb pasta now so you don't have to eat paper

I'm on a quasi-low-carb diet. Sorta.

By I, (Ranger) on Sunday, November 14, 2004 - 03:36 pm:

I love stroganoff (I use turkey)- even if it looks goofy when you spell it out.

By I, (Ranger) on Sunday, November 14, 2004 - 04:38 pm:

I got this one from the thirty minute meals woman of food network:

Quick Chicken Cacciatore

1 1/4 pounds boneless, skinless chicken breast or, 1 package boneless, skinless chicken thighs,
Salt and freshly ground black pepper
2 tablespoons extra-virgin olive oil
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper flakes
2 portobello mushroom caps, halved crosswise and thinly sliced
4 cloves garlic, crushed and minced
1/2 cup broth or stock
1 (28-ounces) can crushed tomatoes
A handful flat-leaf parsley, chopped
1 pound egg ribbons or egg fettuccini, cooked al dente
Crusty bread and grated Parmigiano or Romano

Heat a large nonstick skillet over medium high heat. Add half of the extra-virgin olive oil and brown chicken breasts or thighs for 3 or 4 minutes on each side. Remove chicken from pan and season with salt and pepper.
Return pan to stove, reduce heat to medium and add the remaining. Add crushed pepper, sliced mushrooms, and garlic. Season with sal. Cover and cook mushrooms 5 minutes or until mushrooms are dark, tender and have given off their juices. Add about 1/2 cup of beef broth to intensify the wild mushroom flavor, then stir in the tomatoes and parsley. Cut the chicken into bite-size chunks or slices and add to sauce. Simmer sauce 5 minutes to finish cooking chicken pieces and to allow the flavors to combine. Toss pasta with cacciatore and serve with crusty bread and grated cheese.

By Ms. Vice (Nat) on Monday, November 15, 2004 - 09:16 am:

Throw in a couple bay leaves with the cacciatore if you got 'em. I'm surprised what's her name on the show left that out of the recipe.

By Technomage (Houdini) on Thursday, November 18, 2004 - 12:01 pm:

The woman you speak of is Rachael Ray. I like her show, I'm also a big fan of Alton Brown's show Good Eats.

Iron Chef just cracks me up. Allthough I think it might be funnier if they got the guys who do the voiceovers for Spike channels Most Extreme Elimination Challenge

By I, (Ranger) on Friday, November 19, 2004 - 03:51 pm:

She (Rachel Ray) did one show where the meal was 'Meatloaf Patty' It looked really good but the recipe was not on the web site when I went looking.

*G* That's just so wrong Houdini...

By I, (Ranger) on Sunday, January 09, 2005 - 11:24 am:

I did picata with turkey and it turned out pretty well.

Chicken Picata

8 Chicken breasts
juice of 2 Lemons
standard size can Chicken broth
1/2 cup Olive oil
dash Pepper
dash Salt
3-4 tbs Flour
tbs butter

Mix flour, pepper, and salt in a bowl. Flour the chicken and place in a pan with the heated
oil and butter until chicken is cooked through.
Remove chiken and use pan juices to mix with lemon juice and chicken broth.
Stir slowly while heating, pour over chicken to serve. Rice is a good companion side.

By Merlin (Merlin) on Wednesday, May 31, 2006 - 05:05 pm:

Scottish Shortbread

1/2 cup sugar
1 cup salted butter
1 1/2 cup flour

(Yes, that's all the ingredients. Just sugar, butter, and flour in a 1:2:3 ratio. As a scotsman I know would say, NO BLOODY VANILLA! NO BLOODY CONFECTIONER'S SUGAR! NO BLOODY MARGARINE!)


Set butter out to get soft. Preheat oven to 325. Cream the butter with an electric mixer. Add the sugar, but keep creaming. Then slowly add the flour. Form the dough into cookies or bars or whatever your preferred shortbread shape happens to be, place on cookie sheet and bake for about 30-45mins, until the edges just start turning golden brown.

By Aileen Pagan-Welch (Ewokie) on Monday, June 05, 2006 - 09:19 am:

This looks like a great recipe, Merlin!! I am going to have to try it this week.

By PsychoHazard (Merlin) on Monday, July 24, 2006 - 04:26 pm:

Well, I hope you liked it. One of these days I really need to get around to putting up the rest of my recipes. The problem is that I do it all by memory, so it's kinda hard sometimes to write it down. Most of the stuff I remember amounts as ratios. I always remember the shortbread recipe as "Sugar:Butter:Flour 1:2:3".

By Sol Hawk (Sol) on Tuesday, August 21, 2007 - 03:48 pm:

I kinda want to do the Shortbread Recipe. If it is easy as 1-2-3 then I stand a chance of pulling it off. I think this is the kind of Shortbread that the Scottsman would make (ie the Scottsman from Samurai Jack, natch!)